Seriously bad news on the commercial loan front. All the best will in the world has not proven effective. In the current banking climate, no one will give us the loan for the building. There is also no selling anything even if we wanted to. They'll give us about 2/3 of what we need to fund the loan. The rest is the cruising kitty and an investment from my mom. Ironically, this means that the property will start making us money in two months rather than costing us for the next 3. However, it's not enough to sustain us. We're going to play games with the cash, I'll pick up another writing contract, and DrC will work 3 months next summer instead of three weeks, and we'll be able to stay out here until May 2010. However, after that we have a hard stop due to lack of funds.

There is part of me that is totally crushed by this. There is another more sensible part of me that says WTF. It's not like realistically we could have kept cruising forever anyway. If nothing else would have stopped us, teenage girls would have put a halt to the whole thing in more or less two years anyway. There is also something rather settling about knowing The Date. We don't have The Plan yet, but at least we know when we get off the boat. It enables us to put boundaries around where we go and what we do. And finally, even before this all went down, I was pretty certain we were going to run out sometime in the summer of 2011 anyway.

Already, the family is brainstorming "What to do next!" There are many ideas floating around. By then, both properties will be completely self-sustaining. If we sell the boat, we can literally move anywhere, do anything, start over. We'll be broke, but we'll largely be unencumbered and we should be able to pull a small amount of starting money out when we offload Don Quixote.

The thought of selling Don Quixote makes my stomach clench.

However, I'm sitting in one of the prettiest docks in the world, listening to the gulls, and contemplating actually going to get a pastry and latte to celebrate circumnavigating Vancouver. I refuse to get depressed because I can't play hookie from making a living for the next forty years.

It's like there is a rule that everything has to get much worse before it gets better. That's not a Murphy rule but it might as well be. I'm going to whine for a bit here. If you don't want to read it, go browse until I'm done.

Things I have to do in the next six weeks:

* Thanksgiving dinner
* Close Eye Craft, sell everything, dump the rest on freecycle, and move the key parts over to Evergreen. Stop all the accounts and utilities, close out taxes, bank accounts and credit cards, and do all the final billing and insurance resolution. Also, get all those damn patients to PAY US.
* Get everything out of LTTM. It looks like we may may may *fingers crossed* be looking at a tenant after the first of the year.
* Move out of the basement. Take all the furniture down to Sacramento.
* Spend a week down in California doing the family thing.
* Homeschool the girls
* Settle in full time on the boat, wedging in everything from the basement that we need for the next few years
* Make Solstice gifts
* Close out the WASSER account
* At least one more DocuSign release

If that were not enough, I just won another contract, this time working for good old WGRD. It's a worthy contract... worth almost 3 months cruising kitty. But of course, the entire project has to be done by...

yes

mid-January.

Argh! And then finally a major breakthrough with my soon to be partners in web site building. Laureen and Behan and I finally figured out what to call the site. This is a bigger deal than you might think since their last idea -- Marlinespike Parenting -- halted my entire creative self in its tracks. Now that the juices are flowing, I really just don't have time to work on it. BAH.

I'm actually pretty clear that this isn't all possible. There is no way. But if you don't hear from me until February, at least you'll know why.

An old friend of mine emailed this to me this morning. I believe we did a similar meme not too long ago, but I think I never replied. Heh. It was interesting how wholly and completely I fail to fit into these meme's any longer. Behan, I challenge you to answer these in light of living on the boat as well. It's a bit daunting.

* * *

1. What time did you get up this morning? 7:00am

2. Diamonds or pearls? diamonds

3. What was the last film you saw at the movies? H.P. and The Order of the Phoenix

4. What is your favorite TV show(s)? We don't watch T.V. I get Battlestar on netflix occasionally.

5. What do you usually have for breakfast? Vanilla latte and an apple

6. What is your middle name? Toast

7. What food do you dislike? liver

8. What is your favorite CD at the moment? Hehe. There is a theme here. We don't get CDs. I listen to a lot of Pandora and iLike recommendations. Currently, I'm tooting on World music and particularly fond of Andean music as well as Sweet Forest.

9. What kind of car do you drive? I don't have a car. Um... I guess you could say I “drive” an Avon 10' dinghy with a really old Yamaha short shaft 4 stroke 9.9 HP.

10. Favorite sandwich? Sourdough bread, sharp cheeses

12. Favorite item of clothing? Fleece pullover

13. If you could go anywhere in the world for a vacation, where would
you go? South. Anyplace south of here.

14. What color is your bathroom? White

15. Favorite brand of clothing? Value Village

16. Where would you retire? I'm either already retired by some measure or I never plan on retiring by another so this is a moot point.

17. Most memorable birthday? Wow, I can't remember any of them. I must have had a good time.

18. Favorite Sport to watch? You're supposed to watch?

19. Furthest place you are sending this? I'm going to post it on the Internet. This reneders distance a basically null.

20. Who do you expect to send this back to you? I wouldn't be surprised if Keet tackles this meme. Though I think she did one similar not too long ago.

21. Person you expect to send it back first? Joey. In fact, he's the only one I'll send it to. I'm posting it to everyone else on LiveJournal.

22.Favorite saying? “Everything in moderation, including moderation.” - Mark Twain

23. When is your birthday? September 17

24. Are you a morning person or a night person? Yes.

25. What is your shoe size? 8

26. Favorite food for Dinner? Sourdough bread, cheese, more apples

27. What did you want to be when you were little? Washington, DC lobbyist

28. What are you doing today? Homeschool parent, cruising sailor, wife, documentaiton consultant

29. What is your favorite candy? Frozen Snickers

30. What is your favorite flower? Gerber daisies

31. What day are you looking forward to most on your calendar? May 1, 2008 when we cut the lines

32. What church do you attend? None of them

33. What are you listening to right now? The waves hitting the shore and the boat rubbing against the fenders

34. What was the last thing you ate? Homemade beef stew and sourdough bread

35. Do you wish on stars? No

36. Do you believe in Angels? No

37. If you were a crayon, what color would you be? the broken box crumbles all melted back together into a fat, fit-for-toddler fist wedge

38. What is your pet peeve? There are way way way too many to list.

39. Last person you spoke to on the phone? Phone? You talk on them? Wow. I just use mine for text messages. Dr C of course.

40. Do you like the person who sent this to you? Yes. He never gives up on me even though we go for years with my being a nitterhead and not calling him.

41. Favorite soft drink? Diet Pepsi

42. Favorite restaurant? Mae Phim

44. Siblings? No

45. Favorite day of the year? Tomorrow

46. Favorite day of the Week? Yesterday

47. Spring or Fall: Summer

48. Hugs or kisses? Sex

49. Chocolate or vanilla? Rocky Road

50. Do you want your friends to e-mail you back? Comments on LJ or link followups would be preferred.

51. What is under your bed? a Yanmar 26 diesel engine

52. Who is the friend you've had longest? Joey now that I think on it. Keet comes a very close second.

53. What did you do last night? Made stew, tried to heat the boat with tea candles and a kerosene lantern, read a book

54. Favorite smell? BeanPod candles, especially the Pink Grapefruit

55. What are you afraid of? rogue waves

56. How many keys on your key ring? Don't have one

57. How many years at your current job? Homeschooling: 1 year, 5 months 2 weeks, 5 days and 2 hours. But who's counting?

58. Favorite city to visit? San Francisco

59. How many towns have you lived in? 14

60. Do you make friends easily? Acquaintenances with whom I enjoy spending time, yes. Really long term, inside baseball friends, very rarely.

That in the same year there would be both a hurricane Dean AND a hurricane Karen. I think someone is trying to tell us something. http://geography.about.com/od/physicalgeography/a/2007names.htm

2007 Hurricane Names
Andrea
Barry
Chantal
Dean
Erin
Felix
Gabrielle
Humberto
Ingrid
Jerry
Karen
Lorenzo
Melissa
Noel
Olga
Pablo
Rebekah
Sebastien
Tanya
Van
Wendy

The practice is SOLD. I want a big SOLD stamp. The practice is SOLD.

We still need a tenant, but we are officially counting down to get out of this industry. DrC starts work for Evergreen Eye Center on December 1, 2007. He is contracted to them for six months and then we are outta here. OUT. It's DONE.

DrC is satisfied. He noted that he sold it for essentially the same amount he bought it for, less the condo. So over 10 years he got paid every year, learned how to run (and not to run) a medical practice, grew as a doctor, and earned an "extra" condo's worth of land value which he converted into our commercial property over on 153rd. Since the sale doesn't include the condo, that means the practice value roughly doubled in that time. That's pretty damn good. I'm proud of him.

Did I say we still need a client? The realtor guy hasn't called yet. I think he's meeting with the furniture guy tomorrow. Fingers remain crossed on that one. The clock is tick tick ticking.

SICK REPORT: For those still following the saga of the snot, I'm on antibiotics and they are working. The golf ball is starting to fade, I can breathe, and I actually functioned pretty normally. Mera is doing well also, with just some lingering snot/lung crap. Jaime and Aeron seem to have dodged the bullet. They keep showing preliminary signs but then they spontaneously remit. DrC, however, looked like death when he came home. He immediately went into the hot tub from which I anticipate he will emerge in a half hour, eat beef broth, and celebrate his practice sale milestone by going to bed and sleeping for 16 hours.

Thanks to samueljl. This is fun. I like the fact that basically I don't have an accent. Good for PODCASTING! Woo hooo!!

What American accent do you have? Your Result: The Midland   "You have a Midland accent" is just another way of saying "you don't have an accent." You probably are from the Midland (Pennsylvania, southern Ohio, southern Indiana, southern Illinois, and Missouri) but then for all we know you could be from Florida or Charleston or one of those big southern cities like Atlanta or Dallas. You have a good voice for TV and radio.
The West
Boston
North Central
The Inland North
The South
Philadelphia
The Northeast
What American accent do you have? Quiz Created on GoToQuiz

So niherlas is right, it can get a lot worse. Though, ironically the predicted power of the sinus infection is the least of the problems. Now I've got an adenoid on the left side that is roughly the size of a golf ball. You can actually see it. It looks like I suddenly got really fat and my jowls sagged... but just on one side. The pain this causes is excruciating. I fear what Mera is going to feel like when she wakes as she had the same pain on the same side. This indicates that the lymph attack is pretty much the standard course for this virus.

Other than that, I actually feel better. The headache and sensation of fever are gone. I'm actually even fighting off the sinus infection just with over the counters and a lot of tea. In the absence of the golf ball in my throat, I probably would have made it without the 'biotics. We try to avoid them whenever possible.

On that note, DrC ordered antibiotics last night but the damn pharmacy closed before I could get them. Ugh. Don't know if that's good or not. In some ways, the fact that my gland system has gone bat shit indicates that it's doing it's job. If it didn't feel like someone had taken a hot poker and rammed it through my ear, tongue and down the throat to get the damned thing in place, I wouldn't bitch. Again, my big worry is Mera. We'll see how she's doing when she wakes up. DrC is symptomatic but insists his flu is "stress related." *rolls eyes* His Macho Maleness does not allow for just being sick, the asshat. I'll give him this, he's a hell of a lot less sick than we were. Knocked out and down for the count yesterday (which is incredible knowing him) but not dead to the world.

And of course today is Aeron's birthday party. Really. This is effing absurd. Last year, I kept postponing it until we agreed to do a half birthday. Then I postponed it until it became this year's party. I can't move it. I'm not infectious and neither is Mera. If she wakes up healthy, we're having this party. I've decided, however, that the theme is "The Crew of S/V Don Quixote didn't have a chance to get Aeron's party together!! Can you help?" It'll be like Blue Clue's except live action and with lots of cupcake sprinkles.

Two bits of reason we need all your positive karmic thinking.

Thing 1) Mera and I are STILL SICK. This is unbelievable. I can't remember being sick like this. Ever. The latest turn in the flu maze is that we no longer can see our heart beat in our eyes. The headache is easing. The body aches are almost gone. This would be great except sometime during the our snot turned green and filled with blood. BLOOD. Unf*ing believable. Infected and bleeding sinuses? This is the flu? Also, an intense burning pain started somewhere between the left ear and the roof of the mouth. Mera says it's in the roof of her mouth but in my case it really feels closer to the ear. I suspect it's originating somewhere in the sinus cavity. The pain radiates in both cases down the back of the throat. Absolutely nothing relieves this pain.

To make matters worse, DrC clearly contracted the virus. He says, "I don't have it as bad as you do." What he forgets is that this wasn't as bad when it started. It just gets progressively worse each day. We can't afford for him to be sick so keep your fingers crossed.

Thing 2) Our real estate dude may have found us a tenant. I'm almost reluctant to hope. But omigod that would be frickin awesome. So please send warm fuzzy Lease LTTM thoughts to a furniture guy in Burien who is looking for more space. He wants THE WHOLE BUILDING all 7200 sq ft and he wants it for the long haul (e.g. 3 years). It could not be better which is what makes me nervous. We need this. We really really need this. While we made the decision to go no matter what, it's the difference between going with no safety net and going with some money left over even if we stay out till Jaime goes to college.

So we need your good vibes. Laureen is teaching me the positive woohoo factor of good karmic thinking. Multiple it people. We need to be healthy and we need Mr. Furniture Guy.

Okay, it was way past time. Lots of folks have been trying to get me to get a hair cut. I look pretty wankers with short hair, and I look like a complete idiot with long. So it's the middle. We're going to go with the middle and hope for the best.

18 to 25 knots for nearly three hours last night during our DSS redux. We had Noey and the family. A sunset. Great wind. WOOOOooooeeee. Very very fun. DrC thinks it might have been our best wind in DQ. That says something really miserable really about the Puget Sound, when you think about it. I refuse to think about it.

It's good to be back home. Very good. The girls and I decided that this was our last trip without daddy. I suspect that vow will last until next summer, but it's certainly the last trip for a very very long time. I had a wonderful time with my father, my mom (not at the same time), and a net.friend Laureen. The girls enjoyed themselves as well.

Now I face the 1000s of things that need to get done in the next 4 months to cut the lines. Virtually all of them have to do with physically getting rid of the practice and moving out of our building. Every morning I drink my coffee, review my nextactions, take a deep cleansing breath, and then plunge.

Have I mentioned that brainswax is brilliant?

Proving again the axiom that everyone needs a staff photographer, brains was on the boat for the sailing series last night and finally had his opportunity to use Mera as his subject.

I'm pretending not to notice that everything in our lives is in a complete state of befuddling flux.

Thanks to all those with ideas on how to break through writer's block and constipated hard drive.

Tomorrow we leave for California on the last of our summer vacations from our life of vacationing. Should be a really enjoyable trip. I'm not looking forward to the drive... not really friendly on the back. I'm also a little worried about our 92 Ford minivan. It only has a few more of these trips left in her, I suspect. We'll see.

School starts when we get back. Argh! School starts. SCHOOL. Remember that? School thing? That school THING? It's like this huge, looming monster about to swoop down on me. Aeron is excited. Jaime is excited. Mera is indifferent. She's busy plowing through the complete works of Philip Pullman. I'm worrying about the time suck. I enjoy homeschooling the girl but it's a big vacuum of time, energy, and ideas.

I have umpteen million reasons to panic this month. Let me just share my stress... spread the wealth as it were:

* Jaime is now a woman, not a girl... officially... which makes one week out of the month something approaching pure hell
* We sold the practice but the papers are not done and the hospital is going squirrely in ways that might make the deal fall through in a catastrophic way
* We do not have a tenant
* Our optical tech just quit
* WASSER wants their laptop back so now I've got no windoz box on the boat
* I've just run out of hard drive space on my mac box
* DrC still hasn't fixed the windlass... and let's not even try to itemize the many thousands of holes in the boat
* My iGTD just topped 400 actions
* The birds ate all the blueberries while Bijoux was on vacation

And the number one reason I'm in a frickin panic...

I've run out of articles for Toast Floats.

For the first time in 8 months, I quite literally have nothing in the queue. Nothing. Nada. I've got a case of writer's block so bad I can hardly see straight. I made a commitment... one article per week for one year. I'm going to do it. It's a sanity and discipline thing. But the next 6 days are just scary.

I can't help link up more of Sammy's great pictures. I really can NOT help myself.

Mera and I have returned from our sojourn with relentlesstoil and samueljl. It was a full and delightfully slow week. We simultaneously did a lot and nothing at all. Sammy took amazing pictures. I feel compelled to point out that in addition to everyone needing a good wife, it would help if everyone had a good photographer as basically one of life's necessary accessories.

Longwood Gardens, Philly downtown history, and the Jersey shore were the project events for the week. We "did craft" and we went swimming. Mostly we just enjoyed the company of folks you trust so deeply you don't need to worry about showing your stretch marks when you change into your bathing suit.

So my vacation from my vacation life is over. Now I need a vacation. Not going to happen. Things are coming to a head at DrC's practice. We've signed the Letter of Intent and the attorney's are now working on the Purchase and Sale agreement. We still don't have a tenant... HELP. Things are winding down there. And in a month or so, we're going to have to find winter quarters for the boat.

I'm taking the kids to California next week as our last hooray before school starts. I was going to put it off until I realized that if I don't take them next week, I just know it won't happen until December. I owe it to the girls and to their grandparents not to screw this one up.

So thank you Keet and Sammy for such a wonderful trip. It was, I think, the calm before the storm of the second half of 2007 for the crew of Don Quixote. After that, however, we should have the lines cut and be truly into the next phase of our lives.

Mera and I are having a wonderful time with Sam and Keet. In no small part, it helps to have a fantastic photographer who likes taking picture of us. Maya is precious, the house is comfy, but we're going a bit stir crazy because its SO FRIGGIN HOT we can't get out as much as we'd like. We're from Seattle. We melt.

The pool at the YMCA was our saving yesterday and the day before. Today, we're going to brave the weather and go to Longwood Gardens. Tomorrow is the Jersey shore.

Did I mention it's hot?

Reprinted here because for the life of me I can not get the link to the original to work in blogger.

All the more reason to test her mettle and tolerance with my LIVEABOARD
SIMULATOR!

Larry
--

"The Liveaboard Simulator"

Just for fun, park your cars in the lot of the convenience store
at least 2 blocks from your house. (Make believe the sidewalk is a
floating dock between your car and the house.

Move yourself and your family (If applicable) into 2 bedrooms and 1
bathroom. Measure the DECK space INSIDE your boat. Make sure the
occupied house has no more space, or closet space, or drawer space.

Boats don't have room for "beds", as such. Fold your Sealy
Posturepedic up against a wall, it won't fit on a boat. Go to a hobby
fabric store and buy a foam pad 5' 10" long and 4' wide AND NO MORE
THAN 3" THICK. Cut it into a triangle so the little end is only 12"
wide. This simulates the foam pad in the V-berth up in the pointy bow
of the sailboat. Bring in the kitchen table from the kitchen you're
not allowed to use. Put the pad UNDER the table, on the floor, so you
can simulate the 3' of headroom over the pad.
Block off both long sides of the pad, and the pointy end so you have
to climb aboard the V-berth from the wide end where your pillows will
be. The hull blocks off the sides of a V-berth and you have to climb
up over the end of it through a narrow opening (hatch to main cabin)
on a boat. You'll climb over your mate's head to go to the potty in
the night. No fun for either party. Test her mettle and resolve by
getting up this way right after you go to bed at night. There are lots
of things to do on a boat and you'll forget at least one of them,
thinking about it laying in bed, like "Did I remember to tie off the
dingy better?" or "Is that spring line (at the dock) or anchor line
(anchored out) as tight as it should be?" Boaters who don't worry
about things like this laying in bed are soon aground or on
fire or the laughing stock of an anchorage.... You need to find out
how much climbing over her she will tolerate BEFORE you're stuck with
a big boat and big marina bills and she refuses to sleep aboard it any
more.....

Bring a coleman stove into the bathroom and set it next to the
bathroom sink. Your boat's sink is smaller, but we'll let you use the
bathroom sink, anyways. Do all your cooking in the bathroom, WITHOUT
using the bathroom power vent. If you have a boat vent, it'll be a
useless 12v one that doesn't draw near the air your bathroom power
vent draws to take away cooking odors. Leave the hall door open to
simulate the open hatch. Take all the screens off your 2 bedroom's
windows. Leave the windows open to let in the bugs that will invade
your boat at dusk, and the flies attracted to the cooking.

Borrow a 25 gallon drum mounted on a trailer. Flush your
toilets into the drums. Trailer the drums to the convenience store to
dump them when they get full. Turn off your sewer, you won't have
one. This will simulate going to the "pump out station" every time the
tiny drum is full. 25 gallons is actually LARGER than most holding
tanks.
They're more like 15 gallons on small sailboats under 40' because they
were added to the boat after the law changed requiring them and there
was no place to put it or a bigger one. They fill up really fast if
you liveaboard!

Unless your boat is large enough to have a big "head" with full bath,
make believe your showers/bathtubs don't work. Make a deal with
someone next door to the convenience store to use THEIR bathroom for
bathing at the OTHER end of the DOCK. (Marina rest room) If you use
this rest room to potty, while you're there, make believe it has no
paper towels or toilet paper. Bring your own. Bring your own soap
and anything else you'd like to use there, too.

If your boat HAS a shower in its little head, we'll let you use the
shower end of the bathtub, but only as much tub as the boat has FREE
shower space
for standing to shower. As the boat's shower drains into a little pan
in the bilge, be sure to leave the soapy shower water in the bottom of
the tub for a few days before draining it. Boat shower sumps always
smell like spent soap growing exotic living organisms science hasn't
actually discovered or named, yet. Make sure your simulated V-berth is
less than 3' from this soapy water for sleeping. The shower sump is
under the passageway to the V-berth next to your pillows.

Run you whole house through a 20 amp breaker to simulate available
dock power at the marina. If you're thinking of anchoring out, turn
off the main breaker and "make do" with a boat battery and
flashlights. Don't forget you have to heat your house on this 20A
supply and try to keep the water from freezing in winter.

Turn off the water main valve in front of your house. Run a hose from
your neighbor's lawn spigot over to your lawn spigot and get all your
water from there. Try to keep the hose from freezing all winter.

As your boat won't have a laundry, disconnect yours. Go to a boat
supply place, like West Marine, and buy you a dock cart. Haul ALL
your supplies, laundry, garbage, etc. between the car at the
convenience store and house in this cart. Once a week, haul your
outboard motor to the car, leave it a day then haul it back to the
house, in the cart, to simulate "boat problems" that require "boat
parts" to be removed/replaced on your "dock". If ANYTHING ever comes
out of that cart between the convenience store and the house, put it
in your garage and forget about it. (Simulates losing it over the
side of the dock, where it sank in 23' of water and was dragged off by
the current.)

Each morning, about 5AM, have someone you don't know run a weedeater
back and forth under your bedroom windows to simulate the fishermen
leaving the marina to go fishing. Have him slam trunk lids, doors,
blow car horns and bang some heavy pans together from 4AM to 5AM
before lighting off the weedeater. (Simulates loading boats
with booze and fishing gear and gas cans.) Once a week, have him bang
the running weedeater into your bedroom wall to simulate the idiot who
drove his boat into the one you're sleeping in because he was half
asleep leaving the dock. Put a rope over a big hook in the ceiling
over your coffee table "bed". Hook one end of the rope to the coffee
table siderail and the other end out where he can pull on it. As soon
as he shuts off the weedeater, have him pull hard 9 times on the rope
to tilt your bed at least 30 degrees. (Simulates the wakes of the
fishermen blasting off trying to beat each other to the fishing.)
Anytime there is a storm in your area, have someone constantly pull on
the rope. It's rough riding storms in the marina! If your boat is a
sailboat, install a big wire from the top of the tallest tree to your
electrical ground in the house to simulate mast lightning strikes in
the marina, or to give you the thought of potential lightning strikes.

Each time you "go out", or think of going boating away from your
marina, disconnect the neighbor's water hose, your electric wires, all
the umbilicals your new boat will use to make life more bearable in
the marina.
Use bottled drinking water for 2 days for everything. Get one of those
5 gallon jugs with the airpump on top from a bottled water company.
This is your boat's "at sea" water system simulator. You'll learn to
conserve water this way. Of course, not having the marina's AC power
supply, you'll be lighting and all from a car battery, your only
source of power. If you own or can borrow a generator, feel free to
leave it running to provide AC power up to the limit of the generator.
If you're thinking about a 30' sailboat, you won't have room for a
generator so don't use it.

Any extra family members must be sleeping on the settees in the main
cabin or in the quarter berth under the cockpit....unless you intend
to get a boat over 40-something feet with an aft cabin. Smaller boats
have quarter berths. Cut a pad out of the same pad material that is no
more than 2' wide by 6' long. Get a cardboard box from an appliance
store that a SMALL refridgerator came in. Put the pad in the box, cut
to fit, and make sure only one end of the box is open. The box can be
no more than 2 feet above the pad. Quarter berths are really tight.
Make them sleep in there, with little or no air circulation. That's
what sleeping in a quarterberth is all about.

Of course, to simulate sleeping anchored out for the weekend, no heat
or air conditioning will be used and all windows will be open without
screens so the bugs can get in.

In the mornings, everybody gets up and goes out on the patio to enjoy
the sunrise. Then, one person at a time goes back inside to dress,
shave, clean themselves in the tiny cabin unless you're a family of
nudists who don't mind looking at each other in the buff. You can't
get dressed in the stinky little head with the door closed on a
sailboat. Hell, there's barely room to bend over so you can sit on the
commode. So, everyone will dress in the main cabin....one at a time.

Boat tables are 2' x 4' and mounted next to the settee. There's no
room for chairs in a boat. So, eat off a 2X4' space on that kitchen
table you slept under while sitting on a couch (settee simulator). You
can also go out with breakfast and sit on the patio (cockpit), if you
like.

Ok, breakfast is over. Crank up the lawnmower under the window for 2
hours. It's time to recharge the batteries from last night's usage and
to freeze the coldplate in the boat's icebox which runs off a
compressor on the engine. Get everybody to clean up your little hovel.
Don't forget to make the beds from ONE END ONLY. You can't get to the
other 3 sides of a boat bed pad.

All hands go outside and washdown the first fiberglass UPS truck that
passes by. That's about how big the deck is on your 35' sailboat that
needs to have the ocean cleaned off it daily or it'll turn the white
fiberglass all brown like the UPS truck. Now, doesn't the UPS truck
look nice like your main deck?

Ok, we're going to need some food, do the laundry, buy some boat parts
that failed because the manufacturer's bean counters got cheap and
used plastics and the wife wants to "eat out, I'm fed up with cooking
on the Coleman stove" today. Let's make believe we're not at home, but
in some exotic port like Ft Lauderdale, today....on our cruise to Key
West......Before "going ashore", plan on buying all the food you'll
want to eat that will:
A - Fit into the Coleman Cooler on the floor
B - You can cook on the Coleman stove without an oven or all those
fancy
kitchen tools you don't have on the boat
C - And will last you for 10 days, in case the wind drops and it takes
more time than we planned at sea.
Plan meals carefully in a boat. We can't buy more than we can STORE,
either!

You haven't washed clothes since you left home and everything is
dirty. Even if it's not, pretend it is for the boater-away-from-home
simulator. Put all the clothes in your simulated boat in a huge
dufflebag so we can take it to the LAUNDRY! Manny's Marina HAS a
laundromat, but the hot water heater is busted (for the last 8 months)
and Manny has "parts on order" for it.....saving Manny $$$$ on the
electric bill! Don't forget to carry the big dufflebag with us on our
"excursion". God that bag stinks, doesn't it?....PU!

Of course, we came here by BOAT, so we don't have a car. Some nice
marinas have a shuttle bus, but they're not a taxi. The shuttle bus
will only go to West Marine or the tourist traps, so we'll be either
taking the city bus, if there is one or taxi cabs or shopping at the
marina store which has almost nothing to buy at enormous prices.

Walk to the 7-11 store, where you have your car stored, but ignore the
car.
Make believe it isn't there. No one drove it to Ft Lauderdale for you.
Use the payphone at the 7-11 and call a cab. Don't give the cab driver
ANY instructions because in Ft Lauderdale you haven't the foggiest
idea where West Marine is located or how to get there, unlike at home.
We'll go to West Marine, first, because if we don't the "head" back on
the boat won't be working for a week because little Suzy broke a valve
in it trying to flush some paper towels. This is your MOST important
project, today....that valve in the toilet!! After the cab drivers
drives around for an hour looking for West Marine and asking his
dispatcher how to get there. Don't forget to UNLOAD your stuff from
the cab, including the dirty clothes in the dufflebag then go into
West Marine and give the clerk a $100 bill, simulating the cost of
toilet parts. Lexus parts are cheaper than toilet parts at West
Marine. See for yourself! The valve she broke, the
seals that will have to be replaced on the way into the valve will
come to $100 easy. Tell the clerk you're using my liveaboard simulator
and to take his girlfriend out to dinner on your $100 greenback. If
you DO buy the boat, this'll come in handy when you DO need boat parts
because he'll remember you for the great time his girlfriend gave him
on your $100 tip.
Hard-to-find boat parts will arrive in DAYS, not months like the rest
of us. It's just a good political move while in simulation mode.

Call another cab from West Marine's phone, saving 50c on payphone
charges.
Load the cab with all your stuff, toilet parts, DIRTY CLOTHES then
tell the cabbie to take you to the laundromat so we can wash the
stinky clothes in the trunk. The luxury marina's laundry in Ft
Lauderdale has a broken hot water heater. They're working on it, the
girl at the store counter, said, yesterday. Mentioning the $12/ft you
paid to park the boat at their dock won't get the laundry working
before we leave for Key West. Do your laundry in the laundromat the
cabbie found for you. Just because noone speaks English in this
neighborhood, don't worry. You'll be fine this time of day near noon.

Call another cab to take us out of here to a supermarket. When you get
there, resist the temptation to "load up" because your boat has
limited storage and very limited refridgeration space (remember?
Coleman Cooler).
Buy from the list we made early this morning. Another package of
cookies is OK. Leave one of the kids guarding the pile of clean
laundry just inside the supermarket's front door....We learned our
lesson and DIDN'T forget and leave it in the cab, again!

Call another cab to take us back to the marina, loaded up with clean
clothes and food and all-important boat parts. Isn't Ft Lauderdale
beautiful from a cab? It's too late to go exploring, today. Maybe
tomorrow.... Don't forget to tell the cab to go to the 7-11 (marina
parking lot)....not your front door....cabs don't float well.

Ok, haul all the stuff in the dock cart from the 7-11 store the two
blocks to the "boat" bedroom. Wait 20 minutes before starting out for
the house.
This simulates waiting for someone to bring back a marina-owned dock
cart from down the docks.....They always leave them outside their
boats, until the marina "crew" get fed up with newbies like us asking
why there aren't any carts and go down the docks to retrieve them.

Put all the stuff away, food and clothes, in the tiny drawer space
provided. Have a beer on the patio (cockpit) and watch the sunset.
THIS is living!

Now, disassemble the toilet in your bathroom, take out the wax ring
under it and put it back. Reassemble the toilet. This completes the
simulation of putting the new valve in the "head" on the boat. Uh, uh,
NO POWERVENT!
GET YOUR HAND OFF THAT SWITCH! The whole "boat" smells like the inside
of the holding tank for hours after fixing the toilet in a real boat,
too! Spray some Lysol if you got it....

After getting up, tomorrow morning, from your "V-Berth", take the
whole family out to breakfast by WALKING to the nearest restaurant,
then take a cab to any local park or attraction you like. We're off
today to see the sights of Ft Lauderdale.....before heading out to
sea, again, to Key West.
Take a cab back home after dinner out and go to bed, exhausted, on
your little foam pad under the table.....

Get up this morning and disconnect all hoses, electrical wires, etc.
Get ready for "sea". Crank up the lawn mower under the open bedroom
window for 4 hours while we motor out to find some wind. ONE
responsible adult MUST be sitting on the hot patio all day, in shifts,
"on watch" looking out for other boats, ships, etc. If you have a
riding lawn mower, let the person "on watch" drive it around the yard
all day to simulate driving the boat down the ICW in heavy traffic.
About 2PM, turn off the engine and just have them sit on the mower
"steering" it on the patio. We're under sail, now. Every hour or so,
take everyone out in the yard with a big rope and have a tug-of-war to
simulate the work involved with setting sail, changing sail, trimming
sail. Make sure everyone gets all sweaty in the heat.
Sailors working on sailboats are always all sweaty or we're not going
anywhere fast! Do this all day, today, all night, tonight, all day,
tomorrow, all night tomorrow night and all day the following day until
5PM when you "arrive" at the next port you're going to. Make sure
noone in the family leaves the confines of the little bedroom or the
patio during our "trip". Make sure everyone conserves water, battery
power, etc., things you'll want to conserve while being at sea on a
trip somewhere. Everyone can go up to the 7-11 for an icecream as soon
as we get the "boat" docked on day 3, the first time anyone has left
the confines of the bedroom/patio in 3 days.

Question - Was anyone suicidal during our simulated voyage? Keep an
eye out for anyone with a problem being cooped up with other family
members. If anyone is attacked, any major fights break out, any
threats to throw the captain to the fish.....forget all about boats
and buy a motorhome, instead.

Ever. Guests with considerably better cameras are the solution.

All right people, the only thing that's really stopping us now is finding a tenant for our business property down in Burien. If you know a doctor, dentist, podiatrist or any other person who wants a really spectacularly nice office space for patients/clients complete with parking, send them my way.

http://tinyurl.com/28uhp8

This is really the last major hurdle. The practice is effectively sold. We're hammering out the last details. As soon as we find a tenant, we start extracting ourselves and getouttadodge.

Argh. Made it 7 months consistently posting to my blog and then fizzled for a week. I guess I was depressed because the click count was down. Need to go out and link whore, really, but I'm not feeling inspired. Too much work on everything, really.

Must get back on track. I made a one year commitment to myself and I need to keep this one thing going if no other.